


This Wasn't Okay (Well Actually It Was)

by absolutelyledge



Category: Bandom, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Homophobia, I wrote this bc im in gay ryden hell, Kind of smut, M/M, Mikey/Ray (mentioned), Ryans POV sorta, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-16
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-05-01 22:28:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5223362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/absolutelyledge/pseuds/absolutelyledge
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This wasn't okay. Ryan wasn't gay. Brendon was a loser who nobody liked. Brendon and Ryan hated eachother. </p><p>Ryan knew all of the above statements to be false. Because this was okay, more then okay and Ryan was so very very gay and Brendon wasn't a loser he was a fucking god and there was no way in hell they could hate each other after this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Wasn't Okay (Well Actually It Was)

This wasn't okay. Ryan wasn't gay. Brendon was a loser who nobody liked. Brendon and Ryan hated eachother. 

Ryan knew all of the above statements to be false. Because this was okay, more then okay and Ryan was so very very gay and Brendon wasn't a loser he was a fucking god and there was no way in hell they could hate each other after this. 

Ryan moaned into Brendon's mouth and clenched his fist in his hair. "Ryan.." Brendon was breathing heavily and Ryan was grinding into him like it was his final wish and to Ryan it fucking was, because he was pretty sure the second he came he would ascend onto a higher plane of existance, one where he had gotten off with Brendon Urie. 

Ryan was pretty sure the moment he came was the moment between Brendon sucking his neck while wildly bucking his hips and the moment Brendon grabbed Ryans hips hard enough to bruise, letting out a broken "fuck babe."

Ryan didn't recall the next few minutes because he had just had the best most amazing and intense orgasm ever and his brain had actually shot out his dick. Of course Ryan was acutely aware of Brendon zipping up his jeans but Ryan didn't really snap out of it until Brendon had his hand on the doorknob

"Oi! Wait for me yeah?" Thats what Ryan said. What Ryan wanted to say was "Stay. Where are you going? I think I like you too much." But of course he didn't say that. He wasn't about to be shot down by the guy who sat alone at lunch.

Ryan zipped up his jeans and stood next to Brendon, he debated resting his hand on Brendons back but Brendon had already opened the door a crack, "hurry up, class gets out in about a minute or so."

For a moment Ryan thought about what Brendon was thinking, maybe Brendon was just as embarrased about getting off with Ryan as Ryan /should/ be. And god should Ryan be embarrased. He couldn't quite manage to be though, with a face and an ass like Brendons who would ever be embarrased to touch him?

•°•708•°•

It had been days since Ryan had felt Brendons lips against his, felt his ass through his jeans and his mouth on his neck. Ryan wanted to do something. His skin was itching. He wanted to sit with Brendon at lunch or wear a shirt that said "BRENDON URIE HAS A GREAT ASS". He knew that would make Brendon uncomfortable though, Brendon often said "I like being under the radar and by myself" to numerous asshole jocks.

Speaking of asshole jocks there was one shoving Brendon into a locker right now. Ryan knew him, almost friends with him actually. Well until now, when he grabbed the guy by the back of his shirt and pulled him away from Brendon. "What the fuck are you doing Mikey?"

"I'm trying to teach the fag a lesson! Caught him looking at Ray today. Fucking filth." Mikey's spit landed an inch away from Brendons left shoe.

"Since when are you a homophobic asshole Mike? Leave the damn kid alone, I can assure you he isn't interested in anyone with a jersey on their back." At least, Ryan hoped.

"Why are you defending him Ryan? You're supposed to be cool man." The words left Ryan feeling a tad bit off. He was supposed to be "cool" and "chill". This wasn't "him", or at least who people assumed he was.

"Listen Mikey, first of all there is nothing wrong with being gay, who cares if you like dick up your ass? For all you know you could love it yourself. And secondly, I don't care about being cool, and what really isn't cool is bullying someone for their sexuality. You don't even know if he /is/ gay." Ryan had no idea where that came from. He was just angry. Brendon didn't deserve this shit. 

"Fuck man. Alright. I'm a reasonable guy. I just better not catch his eyes lingering on anyone else. They aren't interested." Brendon nodded and Mikey started walking away. Ryan was pretty proud of Mikey for handling that so well, probably because he had an assumtion Mikey was gay himself, he probably just got defensive over Ray because he liked him. Wouldn't suprise Ryan.

"What the hell was that for?" Brendon whisper-shouted "I can take care of myself Ryan!" Ryans gut started to twist. He thought he was helping.

"Sorry. I just thought I was helping. I didn't want to see you get hurt." Ryan looked at his feet and realized he was acting a lot more like the friendless loser then Brendon. Ryan guessed he was glad. Brendon shouldn't have to act like a friendless loser, he was too good for that. To Ryan at least.

"I- fuck man it's okay. Why did you do that though, am I that good in bed?" Brendon whispered the last part and Ryan wanted to punch something. He didn't see why it should be a secret. Who cared if everyone knew? Ryan could protect them both. Plus nobody was even in the hallway.

"No- well, yes, but that's not why. And I also don't think you have to whisper anything. Who cares. I'm gay, you are at least somewhat gay, who gives a fuck?" Brendon gave Ryan a look he couldn't place before replying

"You don't care? What if I do? What if I don't want everyone to know I fuck around with people I'm not even dating?" 

"Date me then."

"What?"

"You heard me."

"Are you being serious? Do you even like me?" Ryan just nodded. Then two things happend, the bell rang and people rushed the halls, and Brendon kissed Ryan like his life depended on it. 

A few people hollared and there was at least one homophobic slur thrown their way, but Ryan refused to take his lips off Brendons. They belonged there. He eventually did stop kissing Brendon, only because he was hard and didn't think grinding in the hallway was socially acceptable.

"So you want to date me?"

"Yes. I really really do."

"I cannot believe Ryan Fucking Ross is my boyfriend."

"Mmm, call me your boyfriend again."

"Ryan! We are in public!"

"At least I'm not calling you Daddy."

"Fuck Ryan, can we take this to the closet?"

"But Bren, I just got out."

"Now is not the time Ryan."

**Author's Note:**

> This is a Shit!Fic I wrote in like five minutes because I wanted to wake up the light of my life with some Ryden. Hope you enjoyed it anways though! Also I'm @absolutelyledge on tumblr and twitter.


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